So, one of my I-don't-fucking-care-what-you-think-it's-GREAT-and-you-can-go-fuck-yourself-if-you-disagree songs is "Romeo and Juliet." Written by Mark Knopfler, although my favorite performance is by the Indigo Girls.

I never checked into the lyrics before tonight, because they seemed self-evident.

But either they aren't, or the people doing lyrics on Knopfler's web site are just plain wrong.

This is what the official site says:


Romeo and Juliet

A lovestruck Romeo sings a streetsus serenade
Laying everybody low with me a lovesong that he made
Finds a convenient streetlight steps out of the shade
Says something like you and me babe how about it ?

Juliet says hey it's Romeo you nearly gimme a heart attack
He's underneath the window she's singing hey la my boyfriend's back
You shouldn't come around here singing up at people like that
Anyway what you gonna do about it ?

Juliet the dice were loaded from the start
And I bet and you exploded in my heart
And I forget the movie song
When you wanna realise it was just that the time was wrong Juliet ?

Come up on differents streets they both were streets of shame
Both dirty both mean yes and the dream was just the same
And I dreamed your dream for you and your dream is real
How can you look at me as if I was just another one of your deals ?

Where you can fall for chains of silver you can fall for chains of gold
You can fall for pretty strangers and the promises they hold
You promised me everything you promised me think and thin
Now you just says oh Romeo yeah you know I used to have a scene with him

Juliet when we made love you used to cry
You said I love you like the stars above I'll love you till I die
There's a place for us you know the movie song
When you gonna realise it was just that the time was wrong Juliet ?

I can't do the talk like they talk on TV
And I can't do a love song like the way it's meant to be
I can't do everything but I'd do anything for you
I can't do anything except be in love with you

And all I do is miss you and the way we used to be
All do is keep the beat and bad company
All I do is kiss you through the bars of a rhyme
Julie I'd do the stars with you any time

Juliet when we made love you used to cry
You said I love you like the stars above I'll love you till I die
There's a place for us you know the movie song
When you gonna realise it was just that the time was wrong Juliet ?

A lovestruck Romeo sings a streetsus serenade
Laying everybody low with me a lovesong that he made
Finds a convenient streetlight steps out of the shade
Says something like you and me babe how about it ?


Streetsuss? Really?

There are dozens of other things I have serious problems with in that transcription, including spelling, grammar and punctuation.

But streetsuss?

* Grab the nearest book.
* Open the book to page 56.
* Find the fifth sentence.
* Post the text of the next two to five sentences in your journal along with these instructions.
* Don't dig for your favorite book, the cool book, or the intellectual one: pick the CLOSEST.

***********

"There is not much food, I'm afraid," Goldmoon said, tossing cereal into a pot of boiling water.

"Tika's larder wasn't well stocked," Tasslehoff added in apology. "We've got a loaf of bread, some dried beef, half a moldy cheese, and the oatmeal. Tika must eat her meals out."

-- Dragonlance Chronicles, Dragons of Autumn Twilight, 1988.

Preface: We're in Germany for two weeks for trey's parents' 50th wedding anniversary. We've been here since the third. After being in a cosmopolitan hotel for the first three days, we are now in the German version of Florida, but with saunas and people wandering around with what look like ski poles that are supposed to help them be more healthy.

08 July 10:44 PM

My inner control freak is having a temper tantrum.

I've been exerting the Zen of Airports on it for a while -- the concept that once you're at the airport, events are out of your control, so you might as well just go with it. You do the little things you can, being at your gate at the right time, listening to announcements, but when they decide to change gates at the last minute, or bump you from your flight, or there's a snowstorm in Minneapolis, you just go along.

I've been in an airport since last Wednesday. An airport much like the international terminal at LAX, with long lines, no bars, and no smoking section.

We have three more nights here. Today I thought I was going to be OK. Tonight I want to take the car out and drive around, just to be %%somewhere else%%. But there's nowhere else to be.

The Alps are achingly beautiful. The way the clouds cover the peaks, far peaks and near peaks with stunningly different effects; the way the sun, or sun through clouds, plays off the meadows; even the modern architecture in the style of the old Alpine lodges; all of this is lovely.

But after half an hour, I've seen what I can see from %%here%%, and going %%there%% isn't possible. I can't hike. I might be able to bike, but I'm afraid to try it because of the pain the last time I did.

I got in a ... discussion ... shall we say, [that punctuation is not syntactically correct; read it like stage direction] with my mother in law this morning. We're now in Oberstdorf, which apparently means highest village -- it's just about the southernmost town in Germany. On Saturday at noon, we have to be in Tübingen (not sure about the umlaut), which is apparently in the general vicinity of Stuttgart. We were thinking about going to Munich, which is kind of between the two. Munich is a bit east of here, while Stuttgart is west. But I thought that if we were going to Munich, it made sense to go there at the end of the week and meet everyone in Tübingen rather than going to Munich (2 hours north) and then driving back here (2 hours south) simply to caravan back 4 hours north.

(By the way, what the fuck with Munich? It's München, or Muenchen, or Munchen if you're really anglicizing it. What's with the -ich?)

Anyway, mother in law insists that we return here after going to Munich so we can all caravan.

Caravaning on the autobahns with three cars is a hot pain in the ass. We're perfectly capable of reading a map and following directions, so I see no reason to drive another 2 hours out of our way just to have to stick with two other wifty drivers.

There has been a fair bit of, "Follow us, because I can't explain the directions," so far. I understand that. But we're resourceful. Give us the address, give us any special instructions you feel we need, and we'll be there. And we'll be there before you will, because we're capable of showing up places on time, unlike the rest of the family.

This seems to be an extension of one of the ways in which trey's mother interacts with the world. He describes it as, "I'm cold, put on a sweater." When that doesn't work, it becomes "I'm cold, God wants you to put on a sweater."

So when, this morning, my mother in law told me that we must return here if we go to Munich, I asked why. She said that it's because there's traffic around Munich and it takes a long time to get out of town. I said something like, "Thank you for that information. We will be sure to leave early."

That got me a speech on the last time they were in Germany. It made me sad that the bar wasn't open at 9:30 AM.

I usually don't do these things. But I wanna see the results.

The game:

1. Post 3 things you've done in your lifetime that you don't think anybody else on your friends list has done.


2. See if anybody else responds with "I've done that."


3. Have your friends cut & paste this into their journal to see what unique things they've done in their life.

My entry:

1. Held an emu upright while it recovered from a nice ketamine/xylazine cocktail.


2. Dissected an ostrich leg, drilled holes in it, hung it from a rod and took pictures. In the name of science, of course.


3. Lost my virginity to an albino.

I'm here mostly to spy on you people.

Carry on.